


Rey, Ben, and the Great Kylo Ren

by Kylosmom



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Ben doesn't know what he wants, Everyone Needs A Hug, F/M, Gapyear!Rey, M/M, Music Majors, Rey just wants to sing, Rey stress bakes, and they were ROOMMATES
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-02-18
Updated: 2020-02-18
Packaged: 2021-02-27 22:01:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 947
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22792891
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kylosmom/pseuds/Kylosmom
Summary: Natasha, Pierre, and the Great Comet of 1812 had been something Rey stumbled upon during her sophomore year of college. The story was odd: it focused on eighty pages of War and Peace in which a girl named Natasha cheated on her fiancé with a known womanizer, Anatole. They attempt to elope but it is thwarted by Natasha’s aunt and Anatole’s brother-in-law.Yet the music took her back to a different time:An unusually rainy winter.Cold nights that had her burrowing under all of her blankets.A boy who she could have loved if she had only let herself fall.
Relationships: Poe Dameron/Finn, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 1
Kudos: 3





	Rey, Ben, and the Great Kylo Ren

**Author's Note:**

> How did you find my corner of the internet?
> 
> I'm not a writer by any stretch of the imagination and this piece is more therapy for me than anything else. I don't know exactly how long it is going to be or how often I will post or anything like that. I just needed to get this out of my head and into the world.

Chapter 1

On a Tuesday at the beginning of February, Rey found herself glaring at the clock on her dashboard in the hopes that it would disappear. It was taunting her. An electronic reminder that she was stuck on a schedule designed by someone else. 

“Numerical time is a man-made construct,” Poe had pointed out on several occasions.

She laughed and rolled her eyes but tonight she agreed with him. Today was her only day off this week but that did not excuse her from the monthly meeting. Sure it was only an hour out of her day, but the fact that she still had to go to work on her lone day off made her want to scream.

Lots of things had made her want to scream recently. It was a miracle that she did not just stand in the middle of a public place and scream until her voice was raw. If she used proper breathing and posture she could be screaming for a while without hurting herself too much. Gotta put her degree in use somehow because it was not useful in any other aspect of her life…not from lack of trying on Rey’s part.

When she had pictured her gap year she was a substitute teacher five days a week, a chance for her to taste what being a full time teacher would be like while being paid to do so. She would have saved money so- when she did go to grad school- she could still eat and live. She imagined going out to karaoke bars with her roommates and meeting people her who would have taken an interest in her musical knowledge. She would have dazzled the crowd with her rendition of Whitney Houston’s “I Want to Dance With Somebody” while discreetly mentioning that she was classically trained in opera in the conversations that would follow. She imagined she would be happy.

Instead she was driving to her minimum wage job that was her only source of income while every school district she applied to held her paperwork in a state of limbo. Would they hire her? Have they processed her papers? Would they toss it aside because it was freaking February and school started back in September so why the hell was she applying now? 

All these were great questions that she had no answers to and in all honesty she was not sure she wanted the answers. 

Who wants confirmation that they peaked in college?

Who wants to use their degree that they will be paying off forever?

Who wants to work in their field when they could work for minimum wage at night and have all day to sulk?

Rey groaned and laid her head on the steering wheel. None of this mattered right now, she just needed to get to the meeting.

She took her phone out, plugged in the aux chord, and brought up Spotify before turning the key in the ignition. Recently her Spotify had been plagued with the Beatles, the Beach Boys and- oddly enough- Blink 182 and she found herself complacent in this strange array of genres. Imagine her surprise when a cast album that she had not seen in years appeared in her suggested list.

Natasha, Pierre, and the Great Comet of 1812 had been something she stumbled upon during her sophomore year of college. The story was odd: it focused on eighty pages of War and Peace in which a girl named Natasha cheated on her fiancé with a known womanizer, Anatole. They attempt to elope but it is thwarted by Natasha’s aunt and Anatole’s brother-in-law. 

But the music, oh the music.

The composer was an incredible pianist and it showed in every song. The lyrics were both a way of the characters expressing their feelings as well as a narration of their movements. Rey had felt like she had somehow seen the show just by listening to the album.

She quickly scrolled down to the song that had initially captured her attention a lifetime ago before pulling out of the parking spot.

Philippa Soo’s voice filled the car, her anguish and passion evident, while Rey felt transported to a different time.

An unusually rainy winter.

Cold nights that had her burrowing under her blankets.

Crawling back to the dorm soaked because she had left her umbrella.

Rose staying up with her until the wee hours of the morning in solidarity.

Days spent underground in front of a piano.

A boy who she could have loved if she had only let herself fall.

The messages she had ignored because it had been easier.

The eyes she could never meet because she felt ashamed.

The lies she told so no one would know.

“I just want to sing,” she had whispered.

“Then sing,” he stated softy before leaving the practice room.

Rey snapped back to the present and found the song finished. It took her a second to realize what had happened and where her mind had taken her. She had not thought about any of that since…it had been a long time. Going back to that time, that place, was something she had never spoken about to anyone and- if she did- it was only to talk about the sacrifices she had made to get into the major. It was to stress to those younger than her that the path they were choosing was difficult.

Maybe it was to convince herself that it had been worth it.

And as she drove herself to her minimum wage job in a car that was three seconds from quitting on her, she found herself regretting it all.

She played the song again.


End file.
